Alaala ng Isang Kanta: Kung Akin Ang Mundo

This song keeps on bugging me. In a good way, some good, some painful memories that pains me as I try to reminisce..

KUNG AKIN ANG MUNDO

Kung ako ang may-ari ng mundo, 

Ibibigay ang lahat ng gusto mo, 

Araw-araw pasisikatin ang araw, 

Buwan-buwan pabibilugin ko ang buwan 

Para sa'yo, para sa'yo

CHORUS: 

Susungkitin mga bituin, para lang makahiling, 

Na sana'y maging akin, 

Puso mo at damdamin, 

Kung pwede lang, kung kaya lang, 

Kung akin ang mundo, 

Ang lahat ng ito'y iaalay ko sa'yo... 

Kung ako ang hari ng puso 

Lagi kitang pababantay kay kupido, 

Hindi na luluha ang 'yong mga mata, 

Mananatiling may ngiti sa 'yong labi, 

Para sa'yo, para sa'yo, 

REPEAT CHORUS

-this lyrics was copied and pasted.

"tama sana ang pagkakataon.

mali lang talaga ang naging panahon.

meron pa nga bang natitirang pagkakataon?

hindi ko masasagot ngayon."

:(
its been a month.

Nots!

Why can't I just grab it for just a moment before I let go? How much more time will I need to wait before I can finally be allowed to break down. Amidst these periodic episodes of falling down. I can't seem to understand my curiosity against life. The questions in my mind, strolling to find answers that turns out to be wondrous and heart-shattering all at once.

There was once a girl who knew how to break a heart. Then suddenly one day, she hoped fervently to be welcomed with love because she had its need calling out to her soul and to her life. She wished and wished for all eternity to have that person in her life and gladly was given the privilege. But like the way she wasted another person's love, events took vengeance within her own soul that swarmed her entire years. Like that pain she brought on that other person's life, she took a turn in tasting it herself. She have had a lonely and dark life. Again and again complaining how or why it happened. Not knowing her own fault. The taste of pain will bounce back once more and nobody can stop it. Someday, maybe she'll be able to taste what everyone calls sweetness and happy endings. But, not yet today. Not at this moment. She won't stand a chance. All shall wait. No expectations to dare. Amidst it all, she could not change the fact that somehow she was at fault and must be willing to take all the consequences to her actions. To learn how to take it without complains and again, maybe someday she would have her piece of cake.

Forbid.

This is the very first time that my friends had blocked me from liking somebody else. This is the very first time and yet I can't comprehend what it is that they have against that person. They simply said they don't like him. Again, this is the first time, I can't get a straight answer. This is also the first time, that I found my own self hanging into the air and looking at people hoping they were him. This is the first time that even his friends tell me not to like him.

I don't like. I didn't like. I will not ever like. Those were the things I curiously write inside my mind to forget him. To stop my self from liking him. To stop all this ridiculous assumptions that he likes me. To just forget.

The only thing, that I guess could ever change this feeling, will be knowing. Knowing what it is - the reason- why they don't like me to like him. Strange as it is, what may be the reason? I keep asking. I keep thinking, I keep analyzing and yet I can't find my self answering. They can't find the right words to answer.